5 Ways Partners Can Prepare for Labor and Delivery: A Doula’s Guide
Labor and birth are powerful experiences—not just for the birthing person, but also for the partner. As a doula, I’ve seen firsthand how a prepared and present partner can completely change the tone of the birth space. When a partner is calm, confident, and informed, they help create a safer, more supportive, and empowered environment.
Here are five meaningful ways partners can prepare for labor and delivery, based on evidence-based sources like DONA International, Lamaze, and the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG)—and what I’ve seen work in real births.
1. Take a Quality Childbirth Education Class Together
Understanding what to expect during labor and delivery reduces fear and builds confidence. A reputable childbirth education class—like Lamaze or a doula-led class—teaches you both the stages of labor, pain management options, and hands-on techniques for comfort and support.
💡 Why it matters: Partners who are informed can better advocate, communicate, and offer the right kind of support when it’s needed most.
2. Practice Comfort Measures Before Labor Begins
Partners can learn how to give counter-pressure, offer massages, help with breathing patterns, and set up the birth space (music, lighting, essential oils, etc.). Practicing these before labor begins ensures you're not scrambling in the moment.
💡 Doula tip: Create a birth comfort toolkit at home—include a tennis ball, massage oil, cooling cloth, affirmation cards, and snacks for you both.
3. Understand the Birth Plan and Be Ready to Flex
Discuss the birth preferences together and understand the "why" behind them. It’s helpful if the partner knows what interventions are okay, which ones to ask questions about, and how to support calm decision-making if the plan needs to change.
💡 From DONA International: A supportive partner helps uphold the birthing person’s voice and preferences—not take over decision-making.
4. Learn How to Be Emotionally Present, Not Just Physically There
Labor is more than a physical process—it's emotional, spiritual, and vulnerable. Sometimes the most powerful thing a partner can do is simply hold space: offer eye contact, reassurance, and a calm presence.
💡 ACOG highlights that emotional support during labor has been linked to shorter labors, reduced need for interventions, and more positive birth experiences.
5. Build a Strong Birth Team (Hint: Hire a Doula!)
Having a doula allows the partner to be fully present without pressure to know everything. Doulas don’t replace partners—they enhance their role by offering guidance, reminders, and hands-on backup.
💡 Partners often say: “I was so glad we had a doula. I could focus on being there emotionally, and she handled everything else I wasn’t sure about.”
Being an amazing birth partner doesn’t require perfection—it takes presence, preparation, and a willingness to learn and grow together. You don’t have to do it all, but by taking these five steps, you’ll help create a safe, sacred space for labor, birth, and the incredible journey into parenthood.
If you’d like help preparing for this journey, I’d love to guide you. As your doula, I support not only the birthing person but also you—the partner—because birth is a team experience.
